Me: “I need to get a bigger apartment. I’m running out of space for my stuff. My schoolbooks for these past two years alone have filled two file boxes.

Friend:”You know, you can sell them to make more room.”

Me: “I can’t sell them.” *pause* ” I haven’t read them yet.”

Me and friend: *deskpalm*

(Dear professors– I was kidding! I read them, really!)