You say: “I’m eating a sandwich later.”
Non-sandwich-eating person hears: “I’m eating sandwiches until I get so full I throw up.”

You say: “I had a sandwich last night.”
Non-sandwich-eating person hears: “I ate twenty sandwiches last night, and threw it all up and now my throat hurts and my stomach is killing me.”

You say: “I enjoy sandwiches.”
Non-sandwich-eating person hears: “I like to eat a sandwich every minute, and do orgies every other day. Once a week I bite a head off a bat and offer it to Lucifer.”

Now replace “eat a sandwich” with “drink a beer”, and you will understand the sanctimonious bullshit I have to put up with.

About the Author

Tania N. Arpa (344 Posts)

Writer, I.T. consultant, multi-media artist.